So as we have seen, then, relationship-building is not the same as team-building. When we talk about relationship-building we are talking about a competency in which we cultivate relationships both inside and outside the workplace, with individuals and groups.
I’m going to sum up by suggesting practical ideas of how you can all develop your relationship-building competency ... tips that you can easily incorporate into your day-to-day lives in such a way that they will eventually become a habit.
I’m going to talk about informal relationships but, as we discussed earlier, the ideas can be transferred to a more formal environment. First I’ll talk about initiating new relationships and then I’ll mention a few ways that you can practise developing existing relationships.
Let’s start off with the obvious. Common sense is always a good starting point. The first thing we should all do is to practise simple courtesies. This might seem like common sense to some people, but in actual fact you’d be surprised at how many people do neglect these things. Set yourself a goal to say ‘Good morning’ to three people you normally wouldn’t.
We should also try to get to know colleagues outside the office. Ask people what their interests are. If you share an interest in tennis, say, suggest a game. Plan an occasional social event with co-workers. It doesn’t have to be anything complicated, a coffee together or a picnic lunch, for example.
Another thing you can do is to actually target somebody in your office – somebody you would like to know better. Make it your goal to talk to them. Small talk is fine. Listen to what they say and take notice of the information you learn about their interests. Make sure you keep yourself up to date on what’s happening in the world too. You won’t be very good at small talk if you don’t know about current affairs.
So let’s imagine that we have done these things and that we have started a few new relationships. What can we do to develop them further? How can we nurture the relationships so that they don’t just fizzle out or stay on a plain?
Well, for a start we should focus on a person’s good qualities and not on their deficiencies. Nobody’s perfect after all.
We should also practise effective listening. We are all good at speaking, but how many of us really listen? And people want to be listened to. They appreciate it and they respond. Try it!
If we are in a conflictive situation with somebody, we should focus on the issue and not on the person. So, we can hammer out a point of disagreement but then – shake hands and go for a coffee. Usually it is an issue that is the problem and not a person.
Choose somebody who you consider to be an acquaintance and make a point of learning something new about his or her interests. Think of some questions that you can ask them for when you next meet.
Finally, when you are talking to people with whom you have a relationship of some kind, get into the habit of asking open-ended questions. That way they’ll be able to give their points of view. Sometimes people just need to have the chance to say what they think … and very often it doesn’t happen.
Listen to a trainer at the end of a management training session summing up the importance of relationship-building as a competency and reviewing ways of developing the competency.
Do the Preparation task first. Then listen to the audio. Next go to each Task and do the activity. If you need help, you can read the transcript at any time.
To prepare, answer these questions about ideas you will hear in the listening.
Are these comments true or false?
See the transcript in a popup
Choose the correct words or phrases.
Complete these sentences with the correct phrase.
i'm not used to talking to people i don't know. so it's a bit difficult for me to build all kinds of relationship which is very necessary for one's success. i can't depend on my parents forever...how can i come over my weakpoint to more socialized and open to people. to be honest, i'm quite of temperamental and manic person .i often encounter psychological problems and hardly find anyone to share with...cause' i really don't want to mention .....i'm nearly 20 and i have to think about my future .further life...i'm joining da nang college of foreign languages .a first-year student,and study here for 4 years..in fact..lots of those who don't have further study can earn a good living and of course, they have many practical experiences has such a young age..they don't enjoy a good life like me..work hard to support themselves and their family.it sounds crazy but i always run away from strangers..not grab chance to practice my english with foreigner.. .i have just talked to my friend and he really grew up.i think. while he talked about how he got to know and make friends with foreigners (they come from different countries), his face was shiny and happy .i'm a little jealous and admire him too.he plans to take a job while studying to help his mother. he is great,isn't he? 20 is the most beautiful age but my mind is filled with nothing.no thought and preparation for my life ahead.i live in hoi an famed as an ancient town.and da nang is not very far from my home.just half an hour drive.so it's one of the reasons i study in da nang. for the first year. i don't have many classes. so i go home often.for me. home is the warmest place so i'm eager on weekend to be back to hoi an.next week. i have a month of military training in da nang.a course which is compulsory for all tertiary students in viet nam.and it just come once in each student's life.wow.my teacher says after this course. i will become more mature following the strict rules of army.after that. i have a two- week break for tet holiday(lunar new year)..get back to my thought, i just live for today.,not plan for tomorrow.this commet is so long as i think but i want to confide more things to you.or else my head will explode .it is that when i was asked what you plan to do after university.i said right away.work in a restaurant.or a hotel as an employee.my dream is to own a restaurant based in ancient town which attract lots of tourists,selling vietnamfood in the very vietnamese style. so working as a employee will help me have more expericence. the fact is that the salary is'nt much while the cost of life is rising higher.you can just dream without reflecting on the fact.(material).your need in the real life. the degree i got after my study is the base for me to get better and higher-paid job. (i major in commercial- english) and the challenge is that i have to compete with lots of people of calibre. so i leave all these problem behind and as i say .live your life for the moment. beside. singing and painting refresh me..for you guys reading and not reading my comment. i wish you happiness. longevity. health luck and every thing will be alright no matter how bad it is..
hi ivytranoo nguyen
Focus on your plan and be persistent,as long as you know what you want,keep in mind you will accomplish what you desire
It is said:"Man to Man is unjust"
Then Stop being unjust with you, and make a step through people to achieve you objectives.
I can't able to make good relationship with people.Bcz my english speaking is not better.
Everybody teasing me when i am talking
hello ,i would like to improve my business english and i think its possible here..
i am new on this site,i think it's good website ,my english is intermidiate so i hope to improve it
Excuse me, but I couldn't find the transcript for this audio. I could not understand the word which the woman said on 3:25
"Choose somebody who you consider to be a ..... "
You'll find the transcript in the Instructions & Downloads box, just above the tasks on the page. You'll need a pdf reader to view them, like Adobe or Foxit.
The word you are looking for is similar to, but not quite the same as, the word friend.
The LearnEnglish Team
thats a good idea! Ohh! urra! im find how can i learn english! In our country your site we must bye((((((( and thatdsbad!
hello i m in there in first moment! Wellcome to my world dear friends!
© British Council
The United Kingdom's international organisation for cultural relations and educational opportunities.
A registered charity: 209131 (England and Wales) SC037733 (Scotland).